Friday, December 31, 2010

The Year That Was


It's 4 in the morning on the last day of 2010. I'm still trying to wrap my head around this year. It's been INCREDIBLE. So much has happened and I've changed so much I barely know where to begin to describe all that has happened over the course of just a year. Charles Dickens said it best when he wrote, "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of light, it was the season of darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us..." This helps to somewhat sum up all that I've experienced this past year. I spent half of this year in "the winter of despair" before reaching the "spring of hope". I grew so much this year out of everything that has happened. I am not the same, nor will I ever be. That's one word that can sort of describe this year: change. My views, my personality, my friends, my interests, my perspectives, my ideals, my goals, my dreams, I changed. Paradigms shifted, my eyes opened, the clouds lifted, etc. The big factor in all of this was and is God. I am not exaggerating in the slightest when I say that I have experienced God in a more real way than ever before. It's too hard to even begin to describe here, but I am a new person. I guess if I had to pick one quote to sum up what this year has meant to me, I would pick my all-time favorite verse, Ecclesiastes 3:11, "He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end." This year has been truly beautiful, and I will watch it close with the hope and confidence that 2011 will hold even more wonderful surprises.

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

The Heavens Declare The Glory Of God


"The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of His hands. Day after day they pour forth speech; night after night they display knowledge. There is no speech or language where their voice is not heard. Their voice goes out into all the earth, their words to the ends of the world. In the heavens He has pitched a tent for the sun." -Psalm 19:1-4

Sunday, December 19, 2010

"I Could Never Love Anyone More Than I Love My Sisters."



I just finished watching Little Women. For those who don't know the plot, it's about four sisters and their lives together. I am one of four girls, and this story resounds so deeply for me. True, Amanda acts more like the firstborn, Meg, than I do. And while we have never been able to assign a character to the third sister, Beth, we all cry our eyes out when (SPOILER WARNING!) she dies. This movie touches each of us profoundly in many different ways. As I watched it for the billionth time, I began to pick up on many profound little quotes in this movie that I absolutely love. So I decided to post them here. Read and enjoy! I wish everyone could enjoy the unique, challenging blessing that is the sister relationship. To be able to experience life with these little women is truly a blessing.

  • "I could never love anyone more than I love my sisters!"
  • "You have so many extraordinary gifts, how can you expect to lead a normal life? You're ready to go out and find a new use for your talent. Go and embrace your liberty. And see what wonderful things become of it."
  • "You don't need scores of suitors. You only need one, if he's the right one."
  • "You must write from life, from the depths of your soul."
  • "Over the mysteries of female life there is drawn a veil best left undisturbed."
  • "If God wants me with Him, there is none who will stop Him. I don't mind. I was never like the rest of you, making plans about the great things I'd do. I never saw myself as much, not a great writer like you... Why does everyone want to go away? I don't mind being home. But I don't like being left behind. Now I am the one going ahead. I am not afraid. I can be brave like you. But I know I shall be homesick for you, even in Heaven."
  • "I find it poor logic to say that because women are good, women should vote. Men do not vote because they are good; they vote because they are male. And women should vote, not because we are angels and men are animals, but because we are human beings and citizens of this country."
  • "Late at night my mind would come alive with voices and stories and friends as dear to me as any in the real world. I gave myself up to it, longing for transformation."

Thursday, December 16, 2010

That's What Christmas Is All About, Charlie Brown.


"And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks by night. An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. But the angel said to them, 'Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; He is Christ the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.' Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying, 'Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests.'" -Luke 2:8-14

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Me in Test Form

I'm supposed to be writing a 10-page paper on my "theory of personality". This seemed like a good enough time to re-take the Myers Briggs Personality Test. I found a link online, and re-took it, and the results are scary, they are so accurate. Read and judge for yourselves.

Your Type is
ENFP
ExtravertedIntuitiveFeelingPerceiving
Strength of the preferences %
56256267

You are:
  • moderately expressed extravert
  • moderately expressed intuitive personality
  • distinctively expressed feeling personality
  • distinctively expressed perceiving personality
Like the other Idealists, Champions are rather rare, say three or four percent of the population, but even more than the others they consider intense emotional experiences as being vital to a full life. Champions have a wide range and variety of emotions, and a great passion for novelty. They see life as an exciting drama, pregnant with possibilities for both good and evil, and they want to experience all the meaningful events and fascinating people in the world. The most outgoing of the Idealists, Champions often can't wait to tell others of their extraordinary experiences. Champions can be tireless in talking with others, like fountains that bubble and splash, spilling over their own words to get it all out. And usually this is not simple storytelling; Champions often speak (or write) in the hope of revealing some truth about human experience, or of motivating others with their powerful convictions. Their strong drive to speak out on issues and events, along with their boundless enthusiasm and natural talent with language, makes them the most vivacious and inspiring of all the types.
Fiercely individualistic, Champions strive toward a kind of personal authenticity, and this intention always to be themselves is usually quite attractive to others. At the same time, Champions have outstanding intuitive powers and can tell what is going on inside of others, reading hidden emotions and giving special significance to words or actions. In fact, Champions are constantly scanning the social environment, and no intriguing character or silent motive is likely to escape their attention. Far more than the other Idealists, Champions are keen and probing observers of the people around them, and are capable of intense concentration on another individual. Their attention is rarely passive or casual. On the contrary, Champions tend to be extra sensitive and alert, always ready for emergencies, always on the lookout for what's possible.
Champions are good with people and usually have a wide range of personal relationships. They are warm and full of energy with their friends. They are likable and at ease with colleagues, and handle their employees or students with great skill. They are good in public and on the telephone, and are so spontaneous and dramatic that others love to be in their company. Champions are positive, exuberant people, and often their confidence in the goodness of life and of human nature makes good things happen.

"You do your thing and I do my thing. You are you and I am I. And, if, in the end, we end up together, it's beautiful." -Boy Meets World


Sunday, December 5, 2010

A Sea Lion's Tale


"Once upon a time there lived a sea lion who had lost the sea. He lived in a country known as the barren lands. High on a plateau, far from any coast, it was a place so dry and dusty it could only be called a desert. A kind of coarse grass grew in patches here and there, and a few trees were scattered across the horizon. But mostly, it was dust. And sometimes wind, which together make one very thirsty. Of course, it must seem strange to you that such a beautiful creature should wind up in a desert at all. He was, mind you, a sea lion. But things like this do happen.

"How the sea lion came to the barren lands, no one could remember. It all seemed so very long ago. So long, in fact, it appeared as though he had always been there. Not that he belonged in such an arid place. How could that be? He was after all, a sea lion. But as you know, once you have lived so long in a certain spot, no matter how odd, you come to think of it as home.

"There was a time, many years back, when the sea lion knew he was lost. In those days, he would stop every traveler he met to see if he might help him find his way back to the sea.

"But no one seemed to know the story.

"On he searched, but never finding. After years without success, the sea lion took refuge beneath a solitary tree beside a very small water hole. The tree provided refuge from the burning rays of the sun, which was very fierce in that place. And the water hole, though small and muddy, was wet, in its own way. Here he settled down and got on as best he could.

"Had you journeyed in those days through the barren lands, you might have seen the sea lion for yourself. Quite often in the evening, he would go and sit upon his favorite rock, a very large boulder, which lifted him off the burning sand and allowed him a view of the entire country.

"There he would remain for hours into the night, silhouetted against the sky. And on the best nights, when the wind shifted to the east, a faint smell of salt air would come to him on the breeze. Then he would close his eyes and imagine himself once more at the sea. When he lay himself down to sleep, he would dream of a vast, deep ocean. Twisting and turning, diving and twirling, he would swim and swim and swim. When he woke, he thought he heard the sound of breakers.

"The sea was calling to him.

"The sea lion loved his rock, and he even loved waiting night after night for the sea breezes that might come. Especially he loved the dreams those memories would stir. But as you well know, even the best of dreams cannot go on, and in the morning when the sea lion woke, he was still in the barren lands. Sometimes he would close his eyes and try to fall back asleep. It never seemed to work, for the sun was always very bright.

"Eventually, it became too much for him to bear. He began to visit his rock only on occasion. 'I have too much to do,' he told himself. 'I cannot waste my time just idling about.' He really did not have so much to do. The truth of it was, waking so far from home was such a disappointment, he did not want to have those wonderful dreams anymore. The day finally came when he stopped going to his rock altogether, and he no longer lifted his nose to the wind when the sea breezes blew.

"The sea lion was not entirely alone in those parts. For it was there he met the tortoise. Now this tortoise was an ancient creature, so weathered by his life in the barren lands that at first, the sea lion mistook him for a rock. He told the tortoise of his plight, hoping that this wise one might be able to help him. 'Perhaps,' the tortoise mused, 'this is the sea.' His eyes appeared to be shut against the bright sun, but he was watching the sea lion very closely. The sea lion swept his flippers once against his side, gliding to the end of the water hole and back. 'I don't know,' he said. 'It isn't very deep.' 'Isn't it?' 'Somehow, I thought the sea would broader, deeper. At least I hoped so.'

'You must learn to be happy here,' the tortoise told him one day. 'For it is unlikely you shall ever find this sea of yours.' Deep in his old and shriveled heart, the tortoise envied the sea lion and his sea. 'But I belong to the sea. We are made for each other.' 'Perhaps. But you have been gone so long now, the sea has probably forgotten about you.' This thought had never occurred to the sea lion. But it was true, he had been gone for a long, long time. 'If this is not my home, how can I ever feel at home here?' the sea lion asked. 'You will, in time.' The tortoise appeared to be squinting, his eyes a thin slit. 'I have seen the sea, and it is no better than what you have found here.' 'You have seen the sea!' 'Yes. Come closer,' whispered the tortoise, 'and I will tell you a secret. I am not a tortoise. I am a sea turtle. But I left the sea of my own accord, many years ago, in search of better things. If you stay with me, I will tell you the stories of my adventures.'

"The stories of the ancient tortoise were enchanting and soon cast their spell on the sea lion. As weeks passed into months, his memory of the sea faded. 'The desert,' whispered the tortoise, 'is all that is, or was, or ever will be.' When the sun grew fierce and burned his skin, the sea lion would hide in the shade of the tree, listening to the tales woven by the tortoise. When the dry winds cracked his flippers and filled his eyes with dust, the sea lion would retreat to the water hole. And so the sea lion remained, living his days between the water hole and the tree. The sea no longer filled his dreams.

"It was in May that the winds began to blow. The sea lion had grown used to wind, and at first he did not pay much heed at all. Years of desert life had taught him to turn his back in the direction from which the wind came and cover his eyes with his flippers, so that the dust would not get in. Eventually, the winds would always pass.

"But not this time. Day and night it came, howling across the barren lands. There was nothing to stop its fury, nothing to even slow it down. For forty days and forty nights the wind blew. And then, just as suddenly as it had begun, it stopped. The sea lion lifted himself to have a look around. He could hardly believe his eyes.

"Every single leaf had been stripped from his tree. The branches that remained, with only a twig or two upon them, looked like an old scarecrow. And I do not need to tell you that there was no longer any shade in which to hide. But worse than this, much worse indeed, was what the sea lion saw next. The water hole was completely dry.

"Three weeks after the wind ceased to blow, the sea lion had a dream. Now, as I told you before, there were other nights in which he had dreamed of the sea. But those were long ago and nearly forgotten. Even still, the ocean that filled his dreams this night was so beautiful and clear, so vast and deep, it was as if he were seeing it for the very first time. The sunlight glittered on its surface, and as he dived, the waters all around him shone like an emerald. If he swam quite deep, it turned to jade, cool and dark and mysterious. But he was never frightened, not at all. For I must tell you that in all his dreams of the sea, he had never before found himself in the company of other sea lions. This night there were many, round about him, diving and turning, spinning and twirling. They were playing.

"Oh, how he hated to wake from that wonderful dream. The tears running down his face were the first wet thing he had felt in three weeks. But he did not pause even to wipe them away, he did not pause, in fact, for anything at all. He set his face to the east, and he began to walk as best a sea lion can.

"'Where are you going?' asked the tortoise.

"'I am going to find the sea.'"

This allegory is excerpted from the book Desire by John Eldredge. I love it because it speaks so beautifully of our human hearts. I also love it because my school mascot is a sea lion and because I live by the sea. May you have open hearts to read this story as it's meant to be read.